Wednesday, September 9, 2009

You Can('t) Go Home Again?

Thomas Wolfe wrote, "You can't go home again." The longer I'm away, the truer this becomes.


Why can't you go "home" again? Because you're a different person when you go back. Because the place you're from doesn't change the way you do. Because the people you know change in different ways. Because "home" isn't what you thought it was supposed to be. Because outside your hometown life holds up a mirror and forces you to take a good hard look at who you are, what you want, and how you operate. And when you figure that out, your hometown doesn't seem to fit anymore--if it even ever did.

In other words, "How you gonna keep 'em down on the farm?"



Agree or disagree? Why? Share your thoughts here on the dealio!

7 comments:

  1. Well said... my first thought was that if you "go home" and you recognize each other.. then one or both of you has not grown... and a well lived life is about the journey, not standing still

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  2. I think Wolfe missed the point. You may not be able to go to the "house" again. Sure all the physical stuff changes, but the soul of a "house" became a "home" because of your memories, that can be revisited, over and over again, either at events like reunions, or late night when you are far away from home, alone with the person you became because of the home you live in during a different place and time. When I return home, even after a trip to the local coffeehouse, sure I've changed, but the home is there waiting for me to return, to sigh, to say to each other, "I missed you." As my friend, you are now living in a place I used to call home. Each time I read one of your texts, blogs or hear your voice on the phone I immediately return to New York City and relish the reason I loved calling the Big Apple my home for a while. I assure you, if I ever move back to New York City, it will still be big enough to make room for one more wondering son.

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  3. From my experience, home does change. And it'll change whether you leave or not.

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  4. I'll be writing a follow up post to this later tonight. Thanks for your feedback!

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  5. This song is about remaining true to your roots no matter where life takes you. Respect the town and the people from where you came and value what you learned from them. I am sure that you are a great source of pride to all that know you, especially your father and mother. Your family and friends are your home and you will always be welcomed back, no matter how far you go. Let's hope it doesn't take you 20 years to figure it out. Peace and love to you and all who know you.


    WHO SAYS YOU CAN'T GO HOME BY BON JOVI

    "I spent 20 years trying to get out of this place
    I was lookin' for something I couldn't replace
    I was runnin' away from the only thing I've ever known

    And like a blind dog without a bone
    I was a gypsy lost in the twilight zone
    I hijacked a rainbow and crashed into a pot of gold

    I've been there, done that, I ain't lookin' back
    The seeds I've sown, saving dimes, spending too much time on the telephone
    Who says you can't go home

    Who says you can't go home
    There's only one place they call me one of their own
    Just a hometown boy, born a Rolling Stone
    Who says you can't go home
    Who says you can't go back, been all around the world and as a matter of fact
    There's only one place left I want to go
    Who says you can't go home
    It's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright

    I went as far as I could, I tried to find a new face
    There isn't one of these lines that I would erase
    I left a million miles of memories on that road

    And every step I take, I know that I'm not alone
    You take the home from the boy, but not the boy from his home
    These are my streets, the only life I've ever known
    Who says you can't go home

    Who says you can't go home
    There's only one place they call me one of their own
    Just a hometown boy, born a Rolling Stone
    Who says you can't go home
    Who says you can't go back, been all around the world and as a matter of fact
    There's only one place left I want to go
    Who says you can't go home

    I've been there, done that, I ain't lookin' back
    It's been a long, long road
    Feels like I never left, that's how the story goes

    It doesn't matter where you are, doesn't matter where you go
    If it's a million miles aways or just a mile up the road
    Take it in, take it with you when you go
    Who says you can't go home

    Who says you can't go back, been all around the world and as a matter of fact
    There's only one place left I want to go
    Who says you can't go home
    It's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright,it's alright"

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  6. Another novelist George Moore wrote, "A man travels the world over in search of what he needs, and returns home to find it."

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  7. Hi there. First of all, sorry for my bad English -- not a native. I see I'm the only one who actually agrees. I think you couldn't be more right. I've been out of home for now 9 years, too much for 26 years out in the world.

    I don't say it's not great to respect your own people at home... you see, I still keep my friends (though the guys actually never made the effort to take some stupid plane and visit me) back in the village and wherever they moved out to.
    But now, it's just not the same. One has to stand a lot of stuff that one actually doesn't like anymore (or never did), listen to the old aunts saying how young and beautiful you were (not anymore? jesus! :D) and the time you messed up something and everybody in town remembers you were a great son-of-a-something when you were a kid.
    I miss home, can't imagine how much, but I can't get back. I miss where I lived a year ago, but I can't get back. And in some months I'll leave this place, I'll miss it but I won't wanna get back... The day I actually fix my position in some boring town I'll miss all the other places, but I will stay there and just remember whatever good I got before, if there was any good.

    Cheers and congrats for the nice blog.

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