floating thoughts

an excerpt from an entry i wrote while sitting at the floating lounge in berlin, germany. enjoy.

"...there's a hostel and floating lounge...i'm sitting here now, alone, in the red glow drinking a large Rothaus beer. i ate a few chips this afternoon so i already feel this going to my head...there's a table over speaking english and i kind of want to go over there and mingle, but i've also enjoyed just being super reflective and introverted this trip. i love observing and am excited to blog and edit my videos...it's been good for me. i realize that i'm ready to share my life with someone...i've spent enough time alone. i want to plan my life with someone and share all these experiences because although they're meaningful it's not the same. it's like the question of, "if a tree falls", if a person travels and experiences, sees the world--does anyone "hear" it? we take pics, we take videos, we write - why? because we want to share our experiences with others. maybe our motivations are different, but i believe we all have this innate desire to share. the reason could be selfish and egotistical, or it could be genuine and in the interest of teaching, inspiring others...

it's awesome - in this lounge right now i hear english, french, german...

but that's the thing. one of the "mottos" i live by is the pike quotation "what you do for yourself..." traveling "alone" is something i did for myself - even though i stayed with friends and family - but i've "documented" this trip for the purpose of sharing, remembering...

i met this guy on a film shoot in palm springs last spring who shared an interesting perspective with me about pictures and videos. he told me about his dad who would say things like, "oh back then i was so...those were the good times..." as if now sucked. i've often thought about this because i feel there are a lot people who live in the past and get hung up on "good" things were. usually, we remember things to be much more awesome or worse than they really were. i think photos and videos are cool, of course, its the business i'm in, but i also enjoy just LIVING IN THE MOMENT and absorbing it now. if you remember it - great - if not, oh well. at least you were FULLY PRESENT for the time that thing or person was in front of you. personally, i feel this is a beautiful way to live life. sometimes i feel that the urge to "capture" and "archive" the moment all the time ruins it. just LIVE IT NOW! cause in the end it doesn't really matter. it matters, but not in the way we think it will. yes, it's nice to reminisce but that can do a lot of damage. learning to live in the moment and be completely PRESENT...is what makes life worthwhile. i don't care what happened 10 years ago or what will happen 10 years from now. what's important is how i'm living now. and right now in this moment i feel both happy and sad. i'm the only person in this place sitting by myself. everyone else is either in groups of 2 or more - besides the bartender. part of this makes me happy because i like to write and observe and think, and part of this makes me sad because i would like to share this moment with someone.

"i don't know i'm here until i talk with someone."

i think that just means in anything you do it's not "real" unless its shared...

i'm gonna have another beer..."

after that, i walked up to the bar, got another beer and struck up a conversation with a fellow traveler from australia. it was so nice to speak with someone who was also exploring the city. this was one of my favorite nights in berlin - it was also my last night before flying back to rome for new years eve. after leaving the lounge, i met up with some friends at a bar and stayed out until 9 a.m. so much fun!

how do you keep track of your traveling/life experiences? photos? videos? blogs? journals? scrapbooks? have you ever just gone somewhere and not documented it? are you scared of forgetting? what helps you live "in the moment"? feel free to share whatever thoughts you have after reading this post...i think this would be an interesting conversation...